A Night Out
by complacently-yours
Summary: "That's the THIRD bartender you've told, Elle. I think the whole world knows by now." One-shot, humor.


"Four beers, we have something to celebrate! This here little _meercat_ finally quit her shitty job run by the _oh-so-powerful_ Lex Luther and left him with a black eye as a parting gift."

The bartender was useless and couldn't even speak when she hit him with her _little smile_ and cocked her head to the side.

This was the third guy that she trapped in her web, and just like the others she just waved him away a _'bored now'_ look on her face.

"That's the THIRD bartender you've told, Elle. I think the whole world knows by now."

She went from playing the _little flirt_ to the _stubborn little child_ with her pink tongue out and pointing at me.

When the beers came I grabbed one to one of hers holding it prisoner.

"Hey! Gimmie!"

Her words came in slurries as her tongue was still out and taunting me.

"I will if you keep your wicked tongue in your mouth, Deal?"

"Deal, meanie."

It slips back in trapped by her teeth, replaced by a little pout and a beer bottle.

All their eyes staying on us, like we were the only girls in the whole world not the only girls in the room; they reeked of whisky and smoke.

But all I could do was smile, with Elle there was something even better then her banter coming along tonight.

An all free pass of not getting hit on by drunken men.

This little electric bunny was the one and only girlfriend of _Lex Luther_ and let me tell you he's one jealous man. They could look but couldn't touch.

"How's _Lex_, still evil?"

"Fine and yes. Plus he smells more like brandy then yesterday, I think _Clarky-boy_ paid him a visit and he had to drink away the goodness. He's still handsome with his bald _kissable_ head."

"Eww…too much details. I hate him remember that little fact? I don't want to know how kissable his head is."

"Ok, miss grumpy. I bet you'll be happy to know we had a little spat before I came here, _over you_."

"What, he wanted you to kill me and you said no?"

"Nope, he didn't like me being all friendly with the person that's trying to take him down. He got this serious angry look in his eyes but all I did was tell him to make out with Clark. I wonder if he took my advice."

Lana and Chloe showed up an hour late, fresh from another case of Clark Kent drama with I was happy to be left out of. P

lus today was ladies night out, no Clark Kent or Lex Luther, no men period.

It just got even better, a gag worthy song started playing but of course any Britney Spears songs are nothing but gag worthy. _'Radar' _the only thing on my radar was a third beer.

"What the hell is the DJ thinking; does he want everyone's ears to start bleeding? Britney Spears sucks."

I'm a bit tipsy but I don't think I imaged this. Elle little miss buddle of fun pointing a finger full of blue spark at my head.

"Take it back."

"What?"

It was a duel in the making, the reporter vs. Sparky the girl wonder, oh that's so fair.

"Take it back, NOW. Say she doesn't suck."

"Guys-"

"Shut up, Lana. Go and obsess over my lover some more. Say it Lois, _say it_."

I was about to go and say a bad word but saw that the whole bar of drunken men and business partners were starting at us, _crap_.

"She doesn't suck, she rocks!"

The sarcasm in the words bit into the air, but it was enough that she put her hand down and was back to smiles and giggles.

We were fine again, just another day in Smallville, get mad and then get happy, but I think Lana is plotting her death this very moment.

But of course her cell phone went off and it was the song _'Radar'_ shoot me now.

"Ooooo, it's from _Lexy. 'Sorry about today, can you come over now'_ Now? What does he think I am a dog that comes when she's called, no; no I haven't even had my second drink yet. Hmmm…should I text back? Mean or gushing with love?"

"I think neither, you'll be too busy dancing with me, _sweet-heart."_

So much for no men period.

You could tell there was a smirk on his face before you even looked at him, _Mr. cocky_, and _Mr. undead_.

Yep, I was staring at a four-hundred year old man that had a god's face and the mind of every other man here except with a little evil added to the mix.

"_Adam_. What are you doing here?"

There wasn't a bit of interest or want in her voice as she gave him the icy stare that made the smirk fall right off his face.

"Looking for you, pet. I'm ready to play, come on. He's not for you, just a rich spoiled son of a-"

Screams came from him, us and the rest of the bar as she toasted him to a nice crisp color and left him only with a inch of life left. But of course in only a few seconds he was up and about, not looking that happy.

"Don't talk about him like your better then he is. He's more of a man then you could ever be, smarter, heck he's even more evil then you, compared to him you're just a pansy. Oh, now you want to play? Get the hell out, Adam and go make out with Peter."

She sat back down, smile back and beer in hand as if that hadn't just happen and we were back to talking about Lex and his bald head.

He left in burned clothes, whistles following him out.

"Out with bad and stupid trash."

Only we were left, the rest ran in confusion and terror, well, free drinks!

The rest of the evening went smoothly, many drinks and gossip about everything from our boys to fashion. And at last our ride came, a long limo filled with roses and lilies, from Lex of course.

"Oh he's_ good_."


End file.
